Are sites like Twitter, Tumblr and, to an extent, Facebook and MySpace just glossy and hip tools designed to forward e-mails for Web 2.0? (Or is it Web 3.0? I can not keep track.)
Seriously. In lieu of the annoying >s and worthless comments that accompany each forwarded e-mail, you get a hipster in an avatar adding worthless comments to the 'amusing' or 'interesting' or 'thought-provoking' or 'must read' things that they found and are trying to share.
Yes, I know. I do it too.
9.03.2009
9.02.2009
FOUR-LEGGED LOSER
All the four-legged wooden chair wanted to be was a super soft sofa when it grew up, just like the sofa in the room the two pieces of furniture shared. It waited for what seemed like wood-years (one wood year is approximately 14 human years) to enter sofa-puberty. The chair checked itself constantly to see if there was hair or wool or cotton where there was no hair or wool or cotton before. It also measured itself constantly, to see if it was beginning a growth spurt which would not end until it was the full-length of a sofa.
The chair was jealous of the sofa across the room. The sofa saw more ass than the chair could dream of. Day after day, anyone who entered the room would almost beeline towards the sofa. The only ass the chair saw were the stragglers, the ones who couldn't plant their ass on the sofa quick enough, or the ones who were ejected from the sofa by a seemingly patriarchal figure. The stragglers or the ejected didn't beeline towards the chair; they hung their heads in defeat and sauntered slowly towards the wooden chair. Once, just once did the chair want to feel like it was their first choice. And the chair thought that the only way this was going to happen was to become a sofa.
The chair was in for a rather large disappointment. Y'see, neither the lumberjacks who cut the wood down, nor the lumber store that filed the wood down, nor the designer who put the wood together, told the chair that the chair was only a chair, and would not be anything else but a chair.
The chair was jealous of the sofa across the room. The sofa saw more ass than the chair could dream of. Day after day, anyone who entered the room would almost beeline towards the sofa. The only ass the chair saw were the stragglers, the ones who couldn't plant their ass on the sofa quick enough, or the ones who were ejected from the sofa by a seemingly patriarchal figure. The stragglers or the ejected didn't beeline towards the chair; they hung their heads in defeat and sauntered slowly towards the wooden chair. Once, just once did the chair want to feel like it was their first choice. And the chair thought that the only way this was going to happen was to become a sofa.
The chair was in for a rather large disappointment. Y'see, neither the lumberjacks who cut the wood down, nor the lumber store that filed the wood down, nor the designer who put the wood together, told the chair that the chair was only a chair, and would not be anything else but a chair.
LOSERBOOK
I'm sure the feelings of the future children/pre-teens who've had their Facebook profiles set up by their newbie parents and/or who've had pictures posted on their parents' walls/albums will be akin to the grown-up Nirvana baby when they realise what their parents have done. Nude baby pictures in a family album tucked away for only family and close friends to see is one thing, but these parents are completely destroying their child's right to privacy by plastering would-be embarrassing photos on a medium that everyone can read. One might say, 'Oh, you could just configure the privacy settings so that's not the case,' but newbie parents aren't familiar with/don't care about that, as Lamebook.com has a few choice pictures of babies covered in their own shit in the midst of a diaper change and of babies breastfeeding on their front page already.
I'm sure all new parents want to show off their newborns because they're so proud and yadda yadda yadda (also see: 16 and Preggers), but I don't think using Facebook is the way to go, especially since anything and everything can be unearthed, or, rather, uninterneted these days. These kids are going to want their privacy when they're older, and I'm sure they don't want their friends in elementary and high school coming across these incriminating photos. It's been stated again and again that one has to be careful when showing their Facebook friends how big of a partier they are and the like because one must assume their prospective employer is going to do a Facebook check to see what they're really like outside the interview/application process. A picture here and there of someone toking up or doing a keg stand isn't going to bode well for their chances at getting hired. If, or, as it is the case these days, when these kids are being stalked by a frienemy, potential girlfriend or boyfriend, or ex-lover down the road, well, I'm sure you get the picture.
I'm sure all new parents want to show off their newborns because they're so proud and yadda yadda yadda (also see: 16 and Preggers), but I don't think using Facebook is the way to go, especially since anything and everything can be unearthed, or, rather, uninterneted these days. These kids are going to want their privacy when they're older, and I'm sure they don't want their friends in elementary and high school coming across these incriminating photos. It's been stated again and again that one has to be careful when showing their Facebook friends how big of a partier they are and the like because one must assume their prospective employer is going to do a Facebook check to see what they're really like outside the interview/application process. A picture here and there of someone toking up or doing a keg stand isn't going to bode well for their chances at getting hired. If, or, as it is the case these days, when these kids are being stalked by a frienemy, potential girlfriend or boyfriend, or ex-lover down the road, well, I'm sure you get the picture.
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